It was a typical Saturday afternoon at The Stucco Hacienda. I woke up from a nice long nap and noticed my toes were stiff. It was a new, weird feeling.
"You know," I said to The Lady of the House. "Ever since that last birthday I've been having more aches and pains. Last week it was my back and shoulders, now my toes are stiff."
"Really?" said The Lady of the House as she rolled up her yoga mat and slipped it into the closet.
"I mean, I ride my bicycle over 60 miles every week, don't I get a pass on this 'getting old' stuff?"
"Hmm," she said.
Later that night we were watching a movie.
"My skin itches," I said as I scratched my arm. I reached for the remote and paused the movie. "Look, look how dry my skin is, it didn't used to be like this."
"Really?" said The Lady of the House as she rubbed lotion in her hands. "Can you start the movie, please?"
Sunday morning found me at the computer and The Lady of the House in her recliner reading the Sunday paper.
"Reading is getting tough these days," I said, getting up from the computer and walking in the living room. "I mean when I was a kid I could spot a lizard on a log in the woods probably 100 feet away. Now…things get fuzzy and blurry…"
"Really?" said The Lady of the House looking over the top of her reading glasses.
"You know," she said as she lowered her paper, "You just might be the very first person in the whole world to ever get old."
"Well I wholeheartedly agree," I said, finally feeling justified.
"Hey," I said. "I think you're making fun of me."
"Really?" she asked with surprise.
Grant McGee is a long-time broadcaster and former truck driver who rides bicycles and likes to talk about his many adventures on the road of life.
Contact him at: firstname.lastname@example.org.