McGee: Life hands us lemon squeezers

Are you one of those folks who has trouble figuring things out?

For instance I just learned how to properly operate my lemon squeezer the other day.  We’ve had the thing for about 2 years.

To use the lemon squeezer you cut a lemon in half and put it in the thing and squeeze with its two handles.

I’d been putting the lemon halves face up in the thing.  I’d lose most of the juice when it squirted everywhere.

Then, I don’t know why, I realized the lemon was supposed to go FACE DOWN in the thing.

I didn’t tell The Lady of the House about my discovery.  She would’ve looked at me weird.

The lesson of the lemon squeezer might explain a lot of things I’ve gotten wrong in my life.

The Lady of the House thinks I don’t listen.

My mom thought I over-thought things.

Like that time in Boy Scouts when “Sarge,” one of the assistant Scoutmasters, told us about a way to make cleanup easy after a campfire meal.

“Boys,” he said, “Rub some bar soap on the pan and cleanup will be a piece of cake.”

So, I dutifully rubbed some bar soap on my frying pan and commenced to cook the evening meal.

Sarge came strolling by my fire.

“Boy, let me see that pan,” said Sarge.

I pulled my pan off the campfire and handed it up to Sarge.

“BOY!  WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING RUBBING SOAP ON THE INSIDE OF YOUR PAN?”

“You said rub soap on the pan and cleanup would be easy, sir,” I said.

“On the daggone OUTSIDE of your pan, not the inside,” he said.  “I’m glad I came by, you’d’a been sick as a dog.”

Too bad I didn’t have Sarge around when it came to such things as dating or financial decisions.

But that’s why things like lemon squeezers are around, to remind us to think.

Grant McGee is a long-time broadcaster and former truck driver who rides bicycles and likes to talk about his many adventures on the road of life.  Contact him at his blog:  
grantmcgeewrites.com.